


Space is Just a Word (Made Up by Someone Who’s Afraid to Get Close)

by sekaies



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Fluff, M/M, Romance, there's a bit of baekchen but you would have to squint very hard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-30
Updated: 2017-06-30
Packaged: 2018-11-21 07:28:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11352714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sekaies/pseuds/sekaies
Summary: Omega Jongin has a hard time seeing what is right there in front of his eyes. So does Alpha Sehun.





	Space is Just a Word (Made Up by Someone Who’s Afraid to Get Close)

**Author's Note:**

> To my lovely prompter: Hello there! I hope you like this fic, I loved your prompt and I hope I did it justice. Sorry i changed a few details tho!

Fridays are the most packed days of Jongin's new college life, he has two classes in the morning, one in the afternoon and the dance crew meets up to practice at 5pm. The breaks he gets in between all of these things are spent either sprinting around the campus to get at the classrooms in time or eating - more like inhaling- his meals. 

So it's safe to say that right now at 7pm, a very sweaty from dance practice Jongin regrets ever agreeing on going to a party with Baekhyun. All he wanna do is take a long shower, put some comfortable sweater pants and watch his favorite show until he falls asleep.

"Why did you even agree on going on the first place then?" He hears Sehun saying from where he's crunched over some papers, his reading glasses resting on the tip of his nose.

"Because he wouldn't leave me alone, the only way to make him stop following me around was to agree. You know him, he doesn't take no for an answer."

"Cancel it now then, call him and say you're sick or something."

"Wish I could, but then he would follow me for another week complaining about leaving him alone."

"Then stop complaining." Sehun says, but there's no bite in his tone, he just laughs at Jongin's defeated face. Jongin really wishes he could be more forward like Sehun when it comes to these, he never sees Baekhyun annoying him, but that could be because Sehun is an alpha and even if he doesn't act on it, it shows on his threatening posture.

Damnit, Jongin wanted to be an alpha sometimes.

"You're the worst best friend ever." Jongin yells as he enters the tiny bathroom and turns on the hot water. He hears the faint sound of Sehun laughing again before stepping under the jet of water.

 

When Jongin leaves the bathroom 10 minutes later, Sehun is still scrunched over the papers. Jongin ignores him because he’s still kind of mad he didn’t indulged his nagging about Baekhyun. He picks an outfit he deems suitable and leaves it laying on top of his bed, he’ll get dressed before leaving to avoid getting his clothes all wrinkled. He decides on watching two episodes of his favorite tv show to pass the time, he ponders on taking a nap but that could eventually turn into a full night of sleep and Baekhyun will not be please if he doesn’t show up.

He sits on his bed with his laptop on his lap and presses play. 

-

Jongin arrives at the party just as things are starting to get a little heated up, he spots Baekhyun on one of the sofas they have in the living room. Apparently this is some senior's house, someone with enough money to afford something better than the campus dormitory. He starts walking on his friend’s direction, trying to avoid getting drinks spilled on his shirt. The smell is overwhelming even for his omega nose, the scent of too many people and too many drinks combined makes his head pound a little. He stops on his way and grabs two bottles of beer in the kitchen, one for him and one for Baekhyun. He's gonna need some alcohol to cope with all these people, and with his tired self.

"What took you so long?" Is the first thing out of Baekhyun's mouth when Jongin gets close enough they can talk over the music.

"I was debating whether or not it would be a dick move to not come at all." Jongin flashes Baekhyun his golden smile. It’s a lie to piss him off, he actually sneaked in 3 episodes instead of 2, Baekhyun rolls his eyes at him. They drink their first beer in silence, just looking around.

Jongin doesn't think he knows anyone here, this party is probably from someone far away from his social circle. He spots an alpha, someone that looks like they came straight out of those teen movies where the guy is a football player, trying to court an omega girl. She looks away shyly but Jongin knows she's probably liking it, by the way her lips are threatening to curl into a smile. His insides churn a little watching the scene, he always wanted to be at the end of an alpha's courting.

He gets up and sets out to get another drink, now he needs to also drink to cope with his bitterness.

Five bottles of beer and several shots of soju later and Jongin it's still bitter. He curses under his breath, the alcohol was supposed to wash it away and not enhance it.

"Baekhyun, hyung!"

"You don't need to scream, Jongin, I'm not even one feet away."

"Don't you think it's funny? That no one ever tried to court me? Like, I know I'm no hot shit but everyone else I know had that at least once. Like am I even more unpleasant than I originally thought?" He hiccups once before proceeding with his monologue. "Will I die alone? Will I have to take care of my own heat forever?"

"No, Jongin, you won't. Trust me."

"I don't trust you, Baekhyun, y'all have been telling me that since high school started and look at me now. Freshman year in college, never courted, forever single, no one wants me etcetera"

"Ok, shut up, Jongin. You've been talking about this for the last 30 minutes already."

"But you know what's funn-"

"Ok I'm done." Baekhyun interrupts Jongin, a hand flat on his mouth. "I promised myself I wouldn't tell you this but I really need you to shut up right now."

Jongin is caught by surprise, he never saw Baekhyun so pissed. He blinks once, twice and watches as Baekhyun seems to be having an internal argument with himself about something.

"Okay, so here's the deal." He removes his hand from Jongin's mouth carefully, as if he's afraid Jongin will start talking again. "The reason no alpha ever tries to get in your pants is because you already smell like other alpha."

"What? That's impossible."

"No, it's not, stop talking and let me explain. You smell like Sehun, Jongin." Jongin thinks his drunk mind is playing tricks on him. "Like, the first time I met you guys I thought I just couldn't tell you apart because you were always together, but once I got to spend time alone with you I realized that you smell like him. Probably everyone in this room thinks you're claimed already, that's why no one even considers you."

"But how? He never bit me." Jongin thinks there’s probably other questions he should be asking, but he opts for the obvious one.

"Here's where things get a little complicated, I read it once at one of my grandma's old books about clans and all those stories about our ancestors that if two wolves spend too much time together they end up rubbing off their scents on each other. In other words, the amount of time you spend with Sehun has actually managed to scent mark you, it's not strong as a bite but it's enough to pass it as that if you don't take a closer look. The thing is, usually if you stayed away from him for some hours or days it would fade, unless..."

"Unless?" Baekhyun seems like he's wondering if this is a good idea or not, again. He has been looking like he’s guilty for saying it since he brought the matter up. 

"Unless you have feelings, Jongin, unless you're unconsciously letting him scent mark you. It's a two way thing, he has to be okay with and so do you. If one alpha tries to claim someone who’s not interested, it doesn't work."

Jongin opens his mouth to say something but nothing comes out. He's trying to think but everything on his mind right now it's screaming at him that this is not real, it's just his drunk mind making up weird conversations.

"If you're wondering, no, he doesn't know. Jongdae and I have tried to squeeze it out of him, without actually telling him, but he's oblivious. Even the fact that you guys are doing it unconsciously is mutual. You're like perfect for each other."

Jongin tunes Baekhyun off after that. When he comes to his senses again, Baekhyun is already dropping him off at his room’s door. He does everything mechanically and by muscle memory, takes of his shoes, his socks, the leather jacket he was wearing and his wallet from his back pocket. He's still replaying what Baekhyun said earlier over and over again on his head. He feels kinda lost and the only person he can think of that would comfort him can't know about his. Sehun.

They've been best friends for as long as he remembers, they saw each other grow. From playing in the sand box down the block from their houses to getting into the same university this year. High school was spent having sleepovers, Jongin cuddled to Sehun's chest every time he cried about being unwanted by other alphas. They never knew.

Right now Jongin wants nothing more than to cuddle Sehun, and it's conflicting, any other day he would do it without thinking about it twice. But right now there's a new implication to this, he knows.

"Well, fuck it, I'll think about it tomorrow." Jongin forgoes his bed and starts to lay beside Sehun. His best friend stirs a little and half opens his eyes.

"Jongin what are you doing? What time is it?"

"Something past 2, I just really need some comfort right now? Please?"

"Of course, just take off your jeans, you know I hate sleeping with those."

Jongin knows, so he takes his jeans off and slides in further into the bed. Sehun’s scent lures him into sleep.

-

Jongin regrets ever drinking that much the moment he opens his eyes the next morning. The light entering the room from the window makes his head pound. It takes some time adjust to his surroundings.

The first he notices is that Sehun is still next to him, already awake, engrossed on his phone where he has Instagram opened. Then he notices the clock on the nightstand, it reads 12am, which means he –at least– got a decent amount of sleep. He shifts a little to rub his eyes, he’s still getting white spots on his vision from the sudden clarity and it’s annoying the hell out of him.

Sehun seems to notice that he’s awake, finally looking away from his phone.

“Hey, you okay?

“Yeah, just a major hangover.”

“That was expected.” Sehun lets out a little laugh, but turns his head to scan Jongin’s body, from head to toe. After giving him a once over and deciding he’s okay physically, he starts talking again. “Do you need anything? Aspirin? Maybe some tea? I know you don’t drink coffee so…”

“Yeah, that would be great. You’re actually the best, have I ever told you that?”

“Yes, lots. Now move your ass a little so I can get up.” Sehun pokes him with his foot.

“Hey, don’t kick sick people.”

“You’re not sick, you’re just a bad drinker.” Sehun says as he grabs a clean t-shirt and some jeans that are thrown over his chair. “I’ll be back in like 20 minutes, if the line isn’t too long at the cafeteria.” 

Jongin just nods, and regrets the action 2 seconds later when his head starts pounding. He sprawls himself on Sehun’s bed and is about to squeeze some more sleep until the alpha is back when he remembers why he drank, and then remembers the talk he had with Baekhyun.

“Fuck it.” He curses, his headache is getting worse.

So basically what Baekhyun meant was that Jongin is somehow claimed? By his best friend? The one and only Oh Sehun? Alpha extraordinary, business major (and also a hell of a dancer) Oh Sehun?

He can’t seem to grasp his mind around it, he would thought he imagined the whole conversation but he knows his mind is not that creative. He’ll need to talk to Baekhyun some more later, and he definitely needs to talk to Sehun, but not right now. Right now he wants to drink his tea and sleep all afternoon until his headache is gone.

-

Jongin feels something poking his arm, he grunts and tries to move away from whatever is trying to interrupt his much needed sleep. The poking is insistent though so he decides to just face whatever is going on so he can go back to sleep as soon as possible. He opens his eyes and Sehun is standing by the bed, lowered so his face is close to Jongin’s. He tries really hard not to notice how good Sehun looks from up close, he has seen him like this countless times already, but it never fails to amaze him.

“What?” Jongin asks.

“I’m going to the library, I have a study group session, will you be okay?”

“Yeah, I’ll make sure not to die.”

“I’m serious, you still look like shit and you haven’t eaten anything.”

“Just the thought of food makes me nauseous, that’s why. I’ll make sure to eat something later.”

“Ok, but text me if you need anything, ‘kay?”

“’kay, good study session.”

“Good nap, see ya later.” And with that Sehun is out of the door, Jongin is about to start thinking about how much Sehun cares for him when sleeps claims him once again. He will leave the thinking for another time.

-

When Monday rolls around, Jongin has already fried half of his brain cells thinking about what Baekhyun said. But that’s not even close to being the worst part of it all. He started to notice all these things about Sehun he never noticed before, it’s like he’s hyper aware of his every move and every little thing he does since the news were broken to him.

For example, he starts to notice that Sehun tends to stand really close to him when they are alone. He knows it has always been like that, but now it has another meaning for him, the way he cuddles closer when they are catching up with their favorite tv shows. Or the way his hand rests on Jongin’s leg when he’s trying to explain something related to Jongin’s homework, because Sehun helps him even if their majors are different.

At some point Jongin even set his mind on trying not to spend so much time around Sehun, but his resolution fell short when he found himself craving the comfort and the heat 5 minutes after he decided that, so he just snugged closer while Sehun pressed play on his Netflix account. He never realized, until this moment, how much they were actually close. Staying away from Sehun was never really an option, it was an automatic thing for him to stay close, to touch. 

His mind is a hurricane now, everything is swirling around, all the information he already knows about them, the things he just noticed and the things Baekhyun said. 

It also doesn't help that he suddenly realizes just how attractive Sehun is. The way his shoulders are wide, how his neck seems so smooth and how it ends where his nice collarbones start. The way his jawline moves when he's speaking or biting his lips in concentration. It makes it that extra hard not to stare when he's hanging around the dorm room with only sweatpants and some white t-shirt, so worn out it slips off his shoulders sometimes. 

“Hey, isn't that shirt mine?” Jongin recognizes the logo on the front, it’s from the dance team he participated in school. It's mostly faded, he remembers being late for practice the day the shirts were given and he ended up with one two sizes too big.

“Yeah, you mind?” He doesn't, really. So he just shakes his head and smiles at Sehun, who goes back to studying, flipping his pen between his fingers like he usually does when he's concentrating. 

"Doesn't it smell too much like me, though?" He really wanted to let Sehun study in peace, but the curiosity got the best of him. It isn't really common for their kind to share clothes, simply because the smell can be overwhelming. 

"Yes, but I like it." Sehun gives him a little smile and goes back to his papers. Jongin wants to question why he likes it, but he knows Sehun really needs to study. He leaves it for another time. 

-

"So how are you doing?" Baekhyun asks the moment Jongin sits across from him at the coffee shop. 

"I'm... I don't know?" Jongin sighs as he takes a sip from his coffee, god he hates coffee but he really needs it today. 

"I imagined. I'm sorry I dropped the bomb in a bad timing, the alcohol in my system kind of broken my brain to mouth filter." Baekhyun looks apologetic as he too takes a sip from his coffee, differently from Jongin, he actually seems to enjoy the poison-like drink. 

"It's okay, I think it was for the better, I would have to know sooner or later." 

"Yeah, anyways, did you tell him about it too?" 

"No, I couldn't find it in me to tell him. I know he needs to know too, but for now I need to sort some things out." 

"I understand, but did you think about it?" 

"That's actually the only thing I did over the weekend. I was like suddenly hyper aware of him and everything he did, it was awful." 

"You do know you were already hyper aware of him, right? Like you literally always snaps to full attention whenever he enters the room." 

"I did?" 

"Yeah. And he does it too, not that I spent that much time with him alone, he gives me the chills." Baekhyun shivers like Sehun is this big scary alpha, and he's a little defenceless beta. Jongin snorts. 

"You do know Sehun is not a scary bossy alpha like you make him to be, right?" 

"Yeah, with you." Baekhyun rolls his eyes at Jongin, but they both let that subject die. Jongin is in bad need of a conversation that don't include the words alpha, Sehun and scent. Baekhyun proves to be just the right person to talk to when he engages them in a long conversation about how much he hates this one teacher. 

-

Jongin really hates taking the theoretical classes sometimes. He knows it's important for him to know all about dance history and how everything started in the first place, but the amount of paperwork he has to do for those classes are not in any way a relaxing thing. 

He entered university as a fine arts major, specifically a dance one. He thought he would, literally, dance his way through it. His dream fell short the moment he got his schedule and he only had a basic level jazz class, the rest were all theory classes. Hence why he joined the dance team, it was the only activity in his schedule that could get him to relax and spend some time doing what he loved. 

He sighed as he turned away another page from the textbook he borrowed from the library a week ago. He had his back to the door, sitting in the middle of his bed, his notebook and colourful pens scattered around him, trying to take notes on everything he was reading so he wouldn't forget it by tomorrow morning. 

He heard the door opening but he was in the middle of reading a long paragraph and he couldn't stop or else he would have to start it all over again. He knew it could only be Sehun, Jongin would greet him when he finished his reading. 

"Hey." Is all Sehun says before flipping himself on the empty space on Jongin's bed. He isn't surprised, he always does that, specially if he had a tiring day. Jongin nods his head to acknowledge he's there and keeps up with his reading.

He doesn't realize his free hand, the one that's not taking notes, has found his way to Sehun's hair until he feels the alpha taking it on his owns hand. Well, to hell with his reading. Jongin really wants to know how can he touch Sehun without knowing he's doing it at all, was he always like that? 

Sehun plays with his fingers a little and then turns Jongin’s hand so he can sniff a little on his wrist. Jongin knows that's a place where his scent is more concentrated. He tries very hard not to close his eyes, but he can't control the way his body melts at the action. His mind though, is nowhere near as relaxed. He wants to pull his hand away from the alpha, ask Sehun what he's doing. Instead, the only thing that leaves his mouth is a shaky "Do I smell that good?" 

He tries to make it playful, raises an eyebrow at Sehun and all. 

"Well, in fact yes. It's comforting in a way? Like all the omegas out there always smell a little too bitter or just pure hormone, you are different though. I wonder why." The last part he speaks more to himself than to Jongin. 

The omega wants to scream, but he bites his tongue. That was definitely not the answer he was waiting for. He was expecting him to throw some snarky comment at him, so they would laugh. But somehow the answer makes Jongin heart beat a little faster. 

"That could be because they are trying to get your attention, I mean, the ones who smell like pure hormones." Jongin says, trying to change the subject to something that won't make him feel like, well, like he feels. 

"Probably, yeah. It happens too many times and I'm still not comfortable." Jongin can see why so many omegas would throw themselves at Sehun, but his mind drifts to unknown lands and he's suddenly thinking that he's glad Sehun isn't comfortable. He's glad he's the one who can get to see Sehun like this, sprawled on his bed with his hair everywhere. _Oh god no, Jongin, don't go there_. He shakes his head to get away from those thoughts. 

"No one ever smelled nice? Like, I mean, you never wanted to give in to one them? Or, i don't know, court some omega you met?" Jongin lets his curiosity take the best of him, yet again, and curses himself mentally for sounding so crestfallen at the thought of another omega near Sehun. 

"Not really." 

Sehun is still playing with Jongin's fingers, slipping his own in between them from time to time. It feels nice. Jongin hates it. 

He goes back to re-reading the paragraph, so much for trying to be a good student. 

"So, you wanna grab some bubble tea after you finish taking notes? My treat." 

"Sure." 

Jongin is sure he's drowning, he just doesn't know where yet. 

-

The rest of the week passes by in flashes of taking an enormous amount of notes, reading too many books and of course a lot of Sehun. Since Sehun is already done with most of his assignments he spends most of his afternoons by Jongin's side, which makes Jongin struggle to finish his assignments. He needs to read everything at least twice because Sehun decided it was a good idea to walk around shirtless, or worst like putting his hands on Jongin's thighs while watching Jongin working. It all just sucks big time, so when Thursday rolls around he decides to take some time away from said roommate. 

He's sitting underneath a tree on the open field they have on campus, the sun is bright and it makes his skin tingle a little but it's nice anyways. He closes his eyes and rest his back on the tree. He hears someone approaching but he's not worried, if it was Sehun he would be able to identify his smell. It's probably Baekhyun or Jongdae, he's not really good at telling them apart. 

"Sunbathing, huh?" It's Jongdae. 

"Yeah, thought I could use some fresh air." He opens his eyes slowly to look at Jongdae. The beta always looks mischievous, but this time he looks more like he's worried. "What got you looking at me like that?" 

"Oh sorry, I'm not really good at hiding my emotions, am I?" Jongdae laughs a little. "It's just that Baekhyun told me that he told you, I was worried you would not take it well." 

"Well, I didn't, but I'm trying to think about it before breaking the news to the other part involved." 

"Yeah, but tell me, what have you been thinking about so hard?" Jongdae copies Jongin and sits on the grass with his back resting on the tree. 

"Just, you know, at first I got so shocked and then I was like just denying it. Like, how could I be scent marked by my best friend? Bullshit, right?" Jongin laughs to lighten the mood, but Jongdae only watches him with curious eyes. "But then, I started noticing all these things. Suddenly I could see how that could happen, but that also freaked me out. We're best friends, I've known him my whole life. It's just weird but it's even weirder that I don't want to stay away from him even if being close means I'll never find myself a mate." 

Jongdae sighs. 

"Ok, here's the thing. You've always dismissed what we say to you about him with ‘he's my best friend, that's what we do', right? That's the problem, you're denying to yourself that he can be more than that. You're not seeing what's in front of your eyes." Jongin doesn't understand where Jongdae is heading with this conversation. "Like, for example, you know how he always buys you your favourite bread?" 

"Yeah, because the café that sells it it's close to one of his classes' building. The point?" 

"Oh, sweetheart, that's what he said to you?" Jongdae looks at him like he's looking at a dumb but cute puppy. "You know Sehun and I share the same major, right? We have the same classes. That cafe is all the way across the campus from our building. He actually walks there to get the fucking bread."

"What?" 

"Yeah, see? You're both too stubborn. I tried talking to him about you, you know? He does the same, he says you're his best friend and 'that's what best friends do'." Jongdae sighs again. Sometimes he just wants to lock them both on a tiny room and let them sort things out. 

"But, if he really wanted me that way" Jongdae snorts, Jongin is still doubting it. "Why doesn't he just fucking claim me or scent marking me for real?" 

"Jongin..." Jongdae is back with the pity expression. "That's not how it works. I know you always had this fantasy where the alpha of your dreams comes and claims you and you both get married and have puppies and all that shit. But think about it, do you really think you can spend your whole life with someone you just met? Do you think someone can just come and scent mark you and that's it? These things take time, you need to be sure you're with the right person. You need to know them and they need to know you, you gotta love them. It's not the other way around. Even if in the end it really isn't Sehun, which I doubt, it will be someone that you'll first get to know, spend time with and the claiming and all that shit comes later." 

"I'm, ugh." Jongin sees Jongdae has a point, he never thought about it that way. He was so focused on how no one wanted him apparently that he forgot it was much more than just wanting someone because they smell nice or look good. 

"I think I know what the problem is, though. You know how we usually don't notice that we are growing? Like we see ourselves in the mirror everyday, so the changes are subtle for us. But when we look at past photos it's shocking because we’ve changed so much." Jongin nods, once again he doesn't know where Jongdae is heading to. "That's what happened to both of you, your feelings changed right in front of your eyes. Each day, a little at a time, and you guys just simply never looked back to see that it changed. But it did, and I know it, I've been there since we were kids too. Yes, both of you always looked for each other, but at some point it started to change. I know it's hard for you right now, but think about it some more. Give yourself a couple of weeks, I'm sure you'll see what I'm talking about." 

"Thank you, really. I don't know what I would do without you and Baekhyun." Jongin is sincere, he's really thankful for both of them. He rests his head on Jongdae's shoulder, and the beta pats his thigh lovingly. It reminds of what Sehun does, but the feeling is totally different. He thinks he's finally getting what Jongdae means. 

Jongdae was always like a brother to him, even if he had two older sisters, it was usually Jongdae who protected and comforted him at times like this. 

"I love you, you know that, right?" Jongin suddenly says, he needs to tell that more to his friends. 

"Yes, I love you too, pup." Jongdae laughs that cute laugh of his and rest his head against Jongin's. "Now let's get some sun quietly." 

Jongin thinks that maybe things will be fine, he just needs to sort them out.

-

Jongin curses under his breath when he feels the sting on his lower back. He should be used to it by now, but it always surprises him and makes his eyes sparkly with unshed tears of pure pain. He tries to keep up with the rest of the team but the choreography they are learning today is exceptionally difficult. He ends up giving up and slumping to his dorm room one hour earlier than usual. 

He tries his best at showering, the hot water soothing the pain just enough so he can get through with washing his hair and body. He drops face-first on his mattress when he’s done, sporting only some old sweatpants. 

Jongin tries concentrating on his breathing, slowly breathing in and out. The pain is back with full force now that the effect of the hot water is gone, he closes his eyes and tries to think of a happy place. That's when he hears the door opening. 

"Hey." He hears Sehun saying, the rustling of clothes probably means Sehun is removing his jacket to hang it behind de door. "Oh, your back is acting up again?" Is what leaves his lips the moment he catches sight of Jongin. 

"How do you know?" 

"Well, you don't lie on your stomach unless your back is hurting. Took a wild guess." 

Sehun knows him so much it's scary sometimes. 

"Yeah, I think I might have made a bad move during practice. It stings like hell. It's like someone is poking me with a thousand needles directly on my muscles." 

"You're lucky my mom packed me some of her special ointment last time I visited. Let me find it." 

Sehun's mom first made this ointment for Jongin when his back ached for the first time. They were thirteen, Jongin made a bad move and end up injuring his waist, the doctor said it wasn't that serious, but it would hurt from time to time. Since that day, Sehun's mom has been constantly preparing a special ointment for Jongin's back. She always had her way with oils and herbal medicine, Sehun rarely visited the pharmacy or the hospital. She also always had a big soft spot for Jongin, and would indulge him every time he visited, making him cookies and ordering chicken. 

"Ok, here it is." Sehun says to himself as he opens the third drawer on his wardrobe. He then moves in the direction of Jongin's bed. Climbing in and sitting on his legs. 

"Ouch, you're heavy." Jongin says, but the truth is that he welcomes the weight, it's warm and having Sehun close always put him at ease. 

"Stop complaining already, you have a stronger lower body than I have. Don't be a baby." 

Jongin pouts anyways. 

Sehun begins to gently apply the ointment on his lower back, it feels like heaven. It burns but also ices at the same time, it's a welcome distraction from the pain. But better than that are Sehun's hands massaging him just at the right spots. They've done this so many times that Jongin doesn't even need to tell Sehun where the knots are anymore. Jongin closes his eyes and let's Sehun's touch take over his mind. It would be really nice if gave Jongin massages like this more often, and on his whole back.

Oh, no. Jongin mind is going _there_ again. 

He tries to think about other stuff quickly, something other than Sehun's nice hands and nice touches and how warm he is. 

"So, my sister called. Said she missed you, are you up for meeting her at the kid's cafe close to the campus? Rahee is going." 

"That sounds nice, Rahee is growing so fast, she's probably already bigger than the last time I saw her." 

"Yeah, sometimes I feel sad I can't watch her grow more closely. Like, every time we meet she already has learned like a thousand new words. Soon she'll be graduating college."

"Ok, drama king, let's not exaggerate that much." But Sehun laughs anyway.

Jongin ends up sleeping somewhere along the way, the soft touches luring him into it. 

-

Jongin ends up sleeping too much and they leave the dorm late for their date with Rahee. 

They arrive at the café 20 minutes after the planned time, and his sister is already there with Rahee, the little girl playing with a couple of toys on the ground. The establishment isn't big, but it's really cozy and offers big pillows and blankets so you can sit on the floor and be closer to the kids. 

"I'm sorry, noona." It's the first thing Jongin says, but he's not looking at his sister, his eyes are already set on Rahee. A big smile on his face. 

"Hi, noona, long time no see." Sehun follows Jongin's greetings. She only smiles and nods her head at them. 

"Do you guys think you'll be okay taking care of her? My meeting will probably keep me away for 3 hours, sorry about ruining your Saturday." 

"Don't worry about us, I'll keep them in line." Sehun answers, and earns a _hey_ for implying that Jongin is also a child. Sehun sticks his tongue out at him. They both seat on the blanket together with the little girl, using pillows for more comfort. 

"Okay, I'll be going then. Bye Rahee, mom will be back later, enjoy your uncles." She kisses her daughter's forehead and then leaves. 

Jongin pretends his heart didn't leap on his chest when she said uncles instead of just uncle. 

"Is there anything she likes to eat?" Sehun interrupts Jongin's thoughts, thank God. 

"Yeah, she likes strawberry. Don't you Rahee?" Jongin pokes her belly and earns a laugh.

"Just like her uncle. I'll get us something then. You look after her." Sehun says as he gets up to place his order at the counter. 

Jongin plays around with some wood blocks they have at cafe, setting up towers and piles just so Rahee can knock them down. She seems to think that's the funniest and greatest thing in the world, judging by the big smile on her face. Jongin feigns disappointment every time she knocks things down, which makes her laughter grow even more. So young and already feeding on his misery, Jongin's really think she's her idiot. 

"More, more." There it is again, another word she has learned. Jongin starts stacking up more blocks as Sehun comes back, he claims the spot he was sitting earlier at Jongin's side. 

"What did you order?" 

"I ordered a strawberry juice for her, and chocolate milk and strawberry shortcake for you." Sehun says, pocketing his wallet and checking the number of his order so he can know when it's their food that it's ready. 

"You know me so well, sometimes it scares me." Jongin hadn't intended to say so serious, but it just came out like that. Sehun stares at him for a few seconds before breaking into a grin. Jongin mentally takes a deep breath, for a moment he thought Sehun had realised his inner turmoil. 

"We've been friends for decades, of course I know you." 

They wait a little more until their order is finally the one being called. Sehun goes to retrieve it. Rahee is still amazed at the wood blocks and how she can blow everything up with just a touch of her hand. 

Sehun sets the tray between them. He ordered some iced americano for himself, along with a chocolate muffin. 

"I don't know how you started liking coffee. Such a traitor, hating coffee was our biggest bond." Jongin grimaces while looking at the drink. 

"Don't be dramatic, it wasn't our biggest bond. Also, I needed to drink it so many times to get through classes that I ended up liking it. It's not that bad." Jongin only makes a ew face. "Eat your cake and drink your chocolate milk, I'll play with her." 

Jongin nods, he really is starving. It's almost 11am and he didn't had breakfast before leaving the dorm. 

Rahee seems to change her playing antics with Sehun, instead of destroying every thing she's actually helping him build things. Her hands almost too little for the big blocks. After a while, and what seems to be half a castle, she gets up from where she's sitting and plops herself onto Sehun's lap. He is surprised at first, but adjusts her on his lap a few moments later. 

"Juice." Rahee says as she looks up at him, puppy eyes and a little pout. 

Sehun holds the juice even though she has both her hands on it, the cup is too big and even with both hands she wouldn't be able to hold it. She drinks some and then offers it to Sehun, he exaggerates his reaction and makes it seem like it's most delicious thing in the world. They both giggle. 

Jongin then realises he stopped halfway at eating his cake to watch them. He thinks he should be jealous she's treating Sehun like this, but the only thing he feels right now is fondness. It's two of the most important people in his world being happy together, he likes the concept. 

Rahee goes back to drinking her juice and stacking wood blocks randomly at their failed attempt of a castle. Sehun praises her for every block, and that seems to do the trick as she continues to stack more and more. 

 

"I wish one day we can watch our children growing together." Sehun days. Jongin chokes on his milk at the "our children".

"Our children?" He's coughing, the milk clearly went down the wrong way. 

"Yes, mine and yours, I always thought we would have at the same time or least close enough so they would grow together." Oh, Jongin gets it now. 

"Oh yeah, that. It would be nice." _It would be even nicer if the kids was truly ours_ is what he wants to say but doesn't. He doesn't even know how that came to his mind. 

They spend the three hours playing around with Rahee, she ends up eating half of Sehun's chocolate muffin. Sehun doesn't seem to care as he feeds her with a smile on his face. Jongin is amused by how much he seems to like her, he knew he liked kids but not to this extent. When his sister finally arrives to get Rahee they are both exhausted and hungry. 

Jongin invites Sehun to his favourite Chicken place, that thankfully is only 2 subway stops from where they are. They eat to their heart's content and head back to the dorm to sleep the rest of the afternoon away. 

-

Jongin knows his heat will probably start tomorrow. He knows that because he has an app that helps him keep on track with it. 

As usual he will be spending the three days of hell at his parents house. They always plan small trips so Jongin can have the house to himself. His mother even prepares him some meals and leaves it in the refrigerator. He has everything he needs back home to at least endure it the best way possible. 

Before the app existed, Sehun would always let Jongin know when he was about to go into heat. He says that he can smell the difference even a few days earlier, when his body is just preparing for it. 

"You will be going tonight?" Sehun asks from where he's sitting on his bed, cross legged and with his textbooks scattered around him. 

"Yeah, I'll be back by Monday I guess, gladly this time it won't make me miss a lot classes. Only friday's." 

"Yeah. Text me, though, so I can know you're alive." 

"I always do." Jongin smiles at Sehun and continues to prepare his backpack with his clothes. He considers bringing one of his textbooks, but leaves it behind because he know he won't be getting shit done while he feels like his insides are burning. 

The house feels empty, it always does. Jongin grew up with two -very loud- sisters, 3 dogs and his parents. The house was never quiet, it was either his sisters fighting over something irrelevant or the dogs barking at anything and everything. He liked it, though, it always made him feel like he wasn't alone. He doesn't dread on it too much, he eats the meal his mother left for him, showers and goes to bed. He'll need all the sleep he can get before the heat strikes. 

Jongin wakes up with something burning his back, he jumps from the bed on instinct, but remembers a few seconds later that it's his own body doing that to him. He curses and heads straight to the bathroom to take a cold shower, it won't help much but it’s worth a shot. On the way to the bathroom he sees the clock, 6a.m. Great, it burns and it woke him up at an ungodly hour.

After showering he lays back on his bed and tries to watch something on tv, maybe concentrating on something else will distract him from the discomfort. It doesn’t matter that he goes through it every three months, it always hurts and burns like it’s the first time. 

He texts Sehun once before having lunch to let him know he’s alive and eating, takes another cold shower and this time he takes one of his toys from the bedside drawers. It doesn’t exactly satisfy him completely, but it takes the edge off for a while. 

He falls asleep sometime between 2 and 3 in the morning, the exhaustion finally bigger than the burning. 

-

When Sunday finally rolls around he wakes up and the burning is almost gone, Jongin takes the opportunity to clean his bedroom and puts the sheets in the washing machine. He takes a long shower to clean away all the sweat and other fluids away from his body, taking his time to scrub himself clean. By the time the clock strikes 12am he can’t feel a thing anymore. He texts Sehun to let him know that he’s done, the alpha invites himself over for dinner so he can accompany Jongin on his way back to the dorm. 

He spends the rest of his afternoon watching old cartoons on his old tv. Waiting for the doorbell to ring. 

When the doorbell finally rings, Jongin is dozing off, spongebob going off in the background. He gets up immediately and almost falls flat on his face on his way to the door. 

“Hi.” Sehun says the moment Jongin opens the door, Jongin doesn’t know exactly why but it feels like he hasn’t seen him in ages. Jongin motions for him to come in, and Sehun does, taking off his shoes before fully entering the living room. Jongin notices that Sehun stiffens a little, his nostrils flaring a bit. 

“Sorry if you can still kind of smell it.” Jongin feels shy, he doesn’t really know why. “I did clean the house but sometimes it stills linger for a few hours.” 

“It’s okay, it isn’t strong, it just caught me by surprise.” Sehun smiles a little at him to reassure him that he’s fine. Jongin believes him, he always does. 

“So what are we having for dinner?” Sehun asks to break the little tension that seems to have settled between them after the previous subject. 

“So, that, hm…” Jongin scratches the back of his head. “I kind of ate everything my mom left me, so ramen?” Jongin smiles at Sehun in hopes that he’ll forgive him for making him come all the way there when ramen is the only available food. 

He watches as Sehun’s expression sunk a little, he always loved Jongin’s mother’s cooking. But he sees that he’s not mad, just a little disappointed. 

“It’s okay, I mean you were suffering through heat and all that, food was probably the only thing pleasing to you.” Jongin feels his heart beating faster, he mentally slaps himself. “But can we eat like right now? I didn’t had anything after breakfast because I had this huge paper to finish.”

Jongin nods and makes a fancy motion to indicate that the kitchen is all Sehun’s. The alpha laughs at him, Jongin turns around to enter the kitchen and he follows him. Sehun playfully grabs Jongin’s butt on his way, the omega stiffens for a second when he feels it, but relaxes a second later. They always do this, it’s okay. At least that’s what Jongin tells himself. 

Jongin watches as Sehun opens the cabinet where they keep the food, it doesn’t amaze him that Sehun knows exactly where it is. They spent half of their lives either on his house or Sehun’s, they know exactly where everything is at both houses. 

“So, Shin Ramyun or Chapagetti?” Sehun asks, holding one in each hand and waving it at Jongin. 

“Shin, always.” Jongin likes the spiciness and also it tasters better with cheese and Jongin always put cheese. Sehun rolls his eyes at Jongin, and he knows that he’s thinking about how Jongin never changes his habits. He moves and puts the water to boil anyway, he knows Jongin won’t have it any other way. 

Jongin gets the block of cheese from the refrigerator and gets himself busy by cutting it into thin slices so it can melt faster when he puts it in his ramen. He’s concentrating really hard on it, so it won’t be too thick but also not too thin you can see through it, when he feels Sehun getting near him. Maybe that’s the radar Jongdae was talking about, but even without looking he just knows is coming in his direction. Now he’s really close, almost pressing against Jongin’s back, and for a moment he panics until he realizes Sehun is aiming for the cabinet above Jongin’s head. That’s where they keep the bowls. Jongin feels kinda disappointed that that was the reason Sehun got so close, so he does exactly the opposite of what his mind tells him and rests back against Sehun. 

Jongin doesn’t want to admit but he misses this, the closeness and the comfort that he finds in Sehun. Somehow it feels like this time his heat was even harder and the 3 days felt more like weeks. He hears the sound of the bowls resting on the counter, the hand that Sehun was using to hold it is now on his waist, as well as his other hand. Jongin lets his head fall onto the other’s shoulder. 

“Is everything okay?” Sehun asks, his fingers now rubbing gentle circles on Jongin’s waist. 

“Yeah, I’m just tired and I missed you a little.” He hears Sehun laughing, and also feels his chest going up and down. Somehow it feels good to voice it out like this, it makes his head calm down. He’s been too invested into not voicing his thoughts about Sehun, into not touching so much, not caving in. Now that he can, partially, put it out, it’s like a part of the weight on his shoulder has been lifted up. Even if he knows Sehun is not aware of the whole thing, for him this is just a tired and clingy Jongin, and he dealt with that way too many times. 

Jongin turns around into Sehun’s embrace then, so he can rest his head on his neck, their height is similar so it’s kind of awkward but comforting anyways. Sehun tightens his hold on Jongin’s waist, this time rubbing his finger on his lower back. The more he does it, the more Jongin relaxes. It all just feels too nice and right. 

It then clicks. Jongin almost hear the sound of something actually clicking inside his head. This, what he has with Sehun, is what he always wanted to have. Someone who will be there for him, at the worst and not just at his best. A bond that sometimes doesn’t need words, just comforting touches and actions. Someone who knows that he’ll choose Shin Ramyun, but asks anyway, who knows that Jongin doesn’t take coffee and that his favorite cake is strawberry cake. 

He knows now, he feels like texting Jongdae but doesn’t wanna break the moment. 

“As much as I would like to cuddle you so you won’t be sad anymore, our ramen is getting soggy by the second.” Sehun is the one who breaks the moment, Jongin pouts and backs away, going back to his cheese cutting. “Don’t look so sad, Nini.” 

Jongin really hates Sehun for using the nickname at such troubled times for him. He threatens to cut Sehun’s throat with the knife he’s using for the cheese but that only earns him a laugh. 

\- 

Jongin doesn't know why Sehun thought it was a good idea to walk around the dorm room with only his sweatpants on. And well, also his glasses. 

Jongin is having a hard time concentrating on anything, everytime he tries to do something his eyes end up where Sehun is. He watches as the skin over lean muscles stretches when he moves, how it seems to be soft yet tight. Sehun has always been a on the pale side, since they were kids. He always worried about sunscreen and not staying in the sun for too long while Jongin would just walk around with nothing and stay under the sun for hours. In some things they are totally the opposite, but it only makes them click even more. 

Jongin last try at doing something productive is studying. He has a few things he printed earlier, that his teacher sent via e-mail so they could read and study before the next class. He manages to read 3 paragraphs before his eyes end up on Sehun’s naked torso. The alpha is also studying, bent over some papers in his desk, tapping his pen while he reads his notes. His glasses are perched on his nose, from where Jongin is he can see his profile. From time to time Sehun pushes the glasses up, after they slide a little. Jongin catches himself staring and tries going back to his reading, too bad he doesn't remember a thing about what he already read. 

He gives up after five tries, even if he doesn't look the thought of Sehun sitting there in all his gloriousness haunts him. 

He contemplates on a sudden thought he had and decides that what better time than right now? _Seize the day, Jongin, go for it_.

“Hey, Sehun, can I talk to you about something?”

Sehun seems a little startled when he looks at Jongin. But nods as he closes his notebook, leaving a pen inside to mark the page he was using. Jongin stretches his hand so Sehun can take it, and leads him to sit on his bed, across from where he is currently sitting. 

“What is it?” Sehun asks, a single eyebrow raised. Jongin knows he can sense something in the air. 

“Have you ever have any thoughts as to why no alpha ever approaches me?” 

“Uhm, not really?” Sehun sounds confused. Jongin knows, Just by the look in his eyes, that he's wondering if he's supposed to know the answer or not. 

“Like, never? Ever?” 

“I don't know, maybe people are blind? Look, Jongin, you are an amazing person and you’ll find someone, don't worry-”

“It's because I'm already marked.” Jongin interrupts him, because he knows where Sehun is going. And he didn't start this conversation to hear his motivational speech. He knows that by heart already. 

“What?” Sehun looks like he just saw a ghost. “By who? I can't smell it.”

“Of course you can't, because it's you.” Jongin thinks he might have killed Sehun’s brain, the alpha only opens and closes his mouth for a while. He supposes he looked the same when this news were broken to him, all those days ago. “Listen, I know you can't quite comprehend it, and I only discovered it recently too. But apparently, you scent marked me.”

“But how? I never bit you.” Jongin kind of wants to laugh, he asked the same question as him on the night he found out. 

“Indeed you did not, but, one can scent mark another just by staying too close for long periods of time. Like we do.” Jongin leaves out the part that it only works if feelings are involved. 

“Oh.” Sehun seems to calm down a little, just to panic again the next second. “Jongin, I'm sorry, I really am, I didn't know. If you want me I can stay away from you, I don't want to be the person blocking you from finding someone.” 

The words leave Sehun’s mouth so quickly that Jongin’s takes some time to process them. He didn't expect Sehun to offer that, but he understands. So he does the thing he's been thinking about earlier. 

“That's not it Sehun, I don't want you to stay away.” Sehun visibly relaxes a little. The muscles on his chest moving a little. Jongin is definitely not staring. “But I want to try something, can you close your eyes for me?” 

Sehun looks confused but follows his orders anyway. 

“Ok, imagine we're on somewhere public. Like the hallways in the dorms. We're both there, just chatting. Now, there's another alpha coming my way. We never saw him, but he's definitely trying to court me. You can smell it. How does that make you feel?” 

Jongin expects a lot of things, even maybe a “nothing”, what he doesn't expect is the growl that leaves Sehun’s throat. It's like he's ready to kill someone, and honestly, it makes Jongin’s inside burn from contentment. That’s an alpha. His alpha. 

So Jongin kisses him. 

He's not sure this is the best idea but it's what he wants - has been wanting for quite some time. Plus, Sehun’s growl has set his body on fire. 

He kisses like he means it, and gladly Sehun is on the same page. It's by no means a sweet first kiss, he tries to communicate with it, tell Sehun all the things he can't put in words.

When they finally break the kiss, both needing the break to get some air in their lungs, Sehun doesn't look confused anymore. Jongin thinks his plan worked, he mentally high fives himself for it. 

“And this is why I smell like get near me and you'll die.” Sehun looks kinda apologetic, but Jongin kisses it out of his system. He doesn't want Sehun to feel anything that is not how right this feels. It finally feels like everything is where it should be, the days of worrying about this not being right or appropriate are just a memory in the past that will probably fade. 

“But, wait,” Jongin sighs as Sehun puts some space between them, he doesn't know exactly how this happened but he's currently on the alpha’s lap. “How did you know you smelled like me?” 

“Baekhyun.” 

Sehun seems to understand exactly what went down, he lets out a big laugh. 

“He was drunk though, luckily. If he never said anything we would probably die unhappy and unmated.” Sehun contemplates for a while before agreeing with Jongin. 

Jongin’s new favourite Sehun smile is the one he can kiss. 

He also takes his time at mapping Sehun’s body with his hands. The smoothness of his shoulders, how his stomach is tight from the muscles he has underneath the pale skin. How his arms are not exactly muscular but it feels strong, as they hook around Jongin to keep him in Sehun’s embrace. 

-

After some more kissing, and maybe some other touches here and there, they are both laying down on Jongin’s bed. As usual, but this time it feels even better. Sehun is an amazing big spoon, if he can say so himself. Now that they settled everything between them, Sehun can freely smell Jongin’s neck like he always wanted. He noses it up and down, drawing shiver’s from the omega. 

“Can I ask you something?” Jongin asks and feels the answer comes as Sehun’s hums while still taking his time smelling his neck. “What do I smell like to you?” 

“Like you?” Sehun seems confused at the question. 

“Yeah, I know I smell like me.” Jongin turns himself around in Sehun’s arms so he can look at him. “I mean, do I smell like flowers? Or any food? Or something, that when you feel it you go “oh Jongin smells like this”.” 

Sehun seems to contemplate for a while, looking down into Jongin’s eyes. 

“It's the opposite. Things smell like you. I think we've been together for so long, as friends I mean, that I actually go “oh, this smells like Jongin” and not the other way around.” 

Jongin feels like his heart might burst. 

-

“Jesus fucking Christ I didn't know you could smell more taken.” Is the first thing out of Baekhyun’s mouth the next day when they gather for lunch. 

Sehun raises his eyebrow at him, and Baekhyun gulps. Jongin finds it all too amusing. 

“So you probably deduced already that I talked to him.” Jongin says before taking a bite from his pizza slice.

“Well, if you didn't then you should.”

“He did.” Sehun replies, as Jongin’s mouth is full. “Thank you, by the way. For telling him, even if you were drunk. Maybe drunk you is nicer.” 

Jongdae chokes on his slice. 

“Jongin, he's too evil, are you sure about this?”

“He's nice to me.” Jongin just shrugs and drinks his soda. 

As they walk around campus later, hand in hand, Jongin’s notices that no one notices them or turn around to look. Usually when new couples arise, they turn into the college’s talk for a few days. 

It's then that Jongin realises, they always been a couple. At least for everyone else. He lets out a small chuckle.

“What is it?” Sehun asks, turning his head to look at Jongin instead of where they are heading to. 

“Nothing, just thought about something interesting. I'll let you know if you buy me bubble tea.” 

“I'm not curious.” Is Sehun’s immediate response. Jongin knows he's lying, Sehun is one of the most curious person ever. 

“Yeah, right. Then don't buy it.” 

After a few more steps, Sehun finally breaks. 

“Chocolate or green tea?” 

Jongin laughs.

**Author's Note:**

> So...this is my biggest fic so far, I really like how it came out in the end. I hope everyone enjoys, because it was one painful ride and sometimes I would almost cry myself our of frustration, and write and re-write the same parts all over again. I know this is mainly Jongin's pov but don't hate Sehun for being oblivious, he was suffering too (in my head, where this story has lots of other details, maybe someday I can write more about it). Thank you for reading and if you can leave me a comment <3


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